so i went to nyc and had a lot of different thoughts while i was there.  first of all american culture is gross... buy buy buy, consume consume consume.... made me sick... secondly what the hell is style and how do you avoid it. just being anti-style is a style within itself.... and i question if some people are anti-everything just because they think it is cool.   also i didn't get into brown, reconfirming the realization that i've wasted teh last 12 years of my life.  parents send your kids to good schools... and all of this leads me to what the hell i'm going to do with my life... right now nothing seems very fulfilling so it seems like i am just going to end up going through the motions just like i did through highschool and never really get anywhere... although i spose that would be my own fault if i didn't make anything of my life but when you don't have anything that you know of to make of your life it is tough to go after it....